How to Talk to Your Parents About Senior Living Options.

How to talk to aging parents about assisted living? While it’s never an easy conversation, it is an extremely important one to have. But if you do your homework and present information in the right way, you may be surprised by your ability to connect with your parents and help them make smart decisions about their future. 

Step 1: Do Your Homework

Make a list of senior living options in the area you’re considering and check out their websites to see what levels of care they offer. For example, The Oaks at Denville offers independent living and assisted living, as well as rehabilitation and skilled nursing. Take a look at this article if you’re not sure what level of care is right for your parents.

Once you narrow your list down by looking at websites and gathering more information, arrange phone calls to learn more about pricing and availability — a step that will ensure that all of the communities you discuss with your parents are viable options.

Step 2. Assess Your Parents’ Needs

Another way to prepare for your conversation is to create a list of challenges your parents are facing. Are they having trouble with daily tasks? Can they safely navigate their home? Do they have any health conditions they have trouble managing? Talk to other family members who spend time with your parents and see if they have any insights to add. These are all points you’ll want to discuss with your parents when talking about senior living options. 

Step 3. Be Ready to Communicate the Benefits of Senior Living

If your parents haven’t seen how the best senior living communities operate, they may base their feelings on outdated perceptions. Today’s top senior living options are not a place to go when you’re out of options. Rather, they’re places where you can get more out of life. Paint a picture for them of being able to meet friends for coffee, take a dip in the heated pool, visit the library for a new book, go to the beauty salon, or watch a movie — all without getting in a car. If they don’t know what senior living has to offer, they can’t make an informed decision.

Step 4: Be Ready With Conversation Starters

Simply asking if your parents have considered their senior living opinions isn’t much of a conversation starter. Instead, ask more open-ended questions such as:

• Do you ever find it difficult to manage the steps to the laundry room or keep up with the house or yard? 
• Do you feel safe at home?
• Has driving become difficult? Do you ever feel like it limits your social opportunities?
• Would you feel less stress if you had less to manage and take care of?
• Would you like to have opportunities to try new things, socialize, play cards, take in performances and lectures, etc?

Step 5: Be an Empathetic Listener

When the time comes to talk with your parents about their options for senior living, have the conversation in person, if possible, and at a time when everyone is feeling rested and not rushed. You certainly want to be empathetic, but remember that nobody wants to feel pitied, especially by their child. Once you calmly and clearly outline your concerns, as well as possible solutions, be prepared to listen. Give your parents the space and time to digest the information you’ve given them and don’t pressure them. Do ask, however, if there is any more information they would like you to track down for them. 

Step 6: Follow Up With an Offer to Arrange a Visit

Give your parents some time and then see if they’d like to visit a senior living community to learn more about what they offer. At The Oaks at Denville, it’s easy to arrange a tour in which your parents will be able to talk with a few residents, tour the campus, and enjoy a meal. 

What Life Looks Like at The Oaks at Denville

The best way to learn more about The Oaks at Denville is to pay us a visit. Our doors are always open to potential new residents. If you’re wondering: What does lunch look like? Do people linger a bit afterward to chat? What classes are going on in the gym? Who’s preparing for an outing and where are they headed? Does happy hour look like fun? At The Oaks at Denville, we think you’ll find an atmosphere that’s friendly, active, and approachable. More importantly, we think it’s a place where residents can lead a life they love while knowing they will receive the best possible care. Contact us today to learn more or to schedule a visit to our campus in Denville, New Jersey.